A change in circumstance
by EllyBop
Summary: This is set after season 2 episode 14 'The Finger'. Gil and Catherine come to terms with how they really feel about each other, finally admitting to one another, feelings that they have kept hidden for too long. Hope you enjoy, rating may change later in the fic :)
1. Chapter 1

The finger

"Cath, have you got a minute?" Gil Grissom asked from behind his desk as he saw the redhead glide past his open office door. Stopping in her tracks she paused in the doorway and leant casually against the frame.

"Yeah?" she replied "What's up?"

Gil shifted uncomfortably in his seat. He could list her a dozen things that were currently bothering him he just wasn't sure he would be able to put it into legible sentences.

To start with, the minute he had saw her drive off with Logan his heart had flipped, he felt it fall into his stomach, and he couldn't fathom what she was doing. Why would she go out with this man?

The second he heard her phone ring on the side of the road his heart flipped again. All of her belongings she had just left behind, not at all like her. His mind was racing, countless possibilities.

It was only an hour later that his heart had stopped thudding in his chest quite so violently, when Sarah appeared bearing news in the form of the severed finger, that he started to calm himself down and think more rationally.

All sorts of words were flung around, one standing out more than the others; 'kidnapping', to god he prayed that she would be alright, if something were to have happened to her, he didn't know what he would have done.

His eyes flicked up and met those of the woman's standing in the doorway "I just wanted to make sure you were alright?" he asked her

"I'm fine" she replied "Pissed that, that bastard could fool me so easily, but otherwise I'm fine" she smiled lightly at the end

"He had us all fooled Cath" Gil said calmly. He wasn't feeling calm inside, his chest was raging, his heart was aching; too long he felt this way about her. Potentially her life could have been in serious danger, and that was all it took for his feelings to come bubbling back to the surface. Keeping them locked down hadn't been easy to start with, but it had grown into something he was comfortable with, or something that he could at least put up with. Gil Grissom was hardly a man that shared his feelings anyway. It hadn't been too hard.

But now.

Now it was something else. He wanted to take two large strides across the room and envelope her in his arms, never letting her go. Vowing to keep her safe, promising her everything would be okay from now on.

But he couldn't. She wouldn't reciprocate his feelings. However much he hated it, there was nothing he could do that would stop her falling for guys like Eddie, and instead choosing men, more like himself. He could hope, but he knew that his hoping would be in vain.


	2. Chapter 2

Catherine lay in bed, wide awake. The past 48 hours hadn't been normal. She was thankful that her life hadn't been in any real danger. No matter how calm and collected she had seemed on the surface, underneath all that, she was shaking like a leaf. The rational side of her brain had still managed to function, leaving behind the trail of clues that would help Grissom and the others know of her whereabouts and her safety. But the irrational part of her brain was whirring. That night she should have been watching Lindsay be 'the woman on the moon', instead she was left hoping that the kidnapping didn't end badly on her part. What if she never got to see her daughter in another recital? What if something had of happened, what would happen to Lindsay? Her baby girl. Her whole life; would be left alone.

And then there was Gil. The man whom; she had become to care, so deeply, about. Catherine would have gone her whole life without declaring her true feelings to that man. He himself, never truly knowing, if his own feelings were reciprocated. What would that do to a man?

Tossing and turning in bed, she gave up on sleep, knowing that it wouldn't claim her anytime soon. Grabbing her dressing gown from the hook on her door she walked into the living room and switched on the TV, not caring what was on, just wanting the dull noise to soothe her slightly.

She awoke with a start, eyes adjusting to the dull glow of the room, her TV still talking quietly, her phone ringing quietly in her bedroom. Pulling herself up of the sofa, she padded into her bedroom and flipped open her phone.

"Hello" she mumbled looking at the clock on her end table, _3:47am_.

"Cath, it's me" came the mumbled reply

"What's up Gil?" she asked

"Are you alright?"

"Well you've just woke me up from the only hours sleep I have managed to get since I've been home. But I'm fine Gil."

"Sorry, but I'm glad you're okay" The line went quiet for a moment while both of them were thinking, talking to Gil temporarily calmed her down, not that she was agitated, more angry than anything else, but hearing his voice pulled her out of that reverie.

"Gil?" She said

"Yes Catherine?"

"Was there something you really wanted to talk about? This is at least the fourth time today you've called me to make sure I'm alright, what's really on your mind?" The fourth time was including the time he called her into his office when they were both still at the lab. And each time it had seemed like there was something else he had wanted to say to her. Something, which he just hadn't quite been able to muster up the courage to do.

"I don't know Cath; I just don't know what to say to you, I just know there's something" he began to say. Catherine sighed and lay down on her bed, wondering if either of them would ever be able to figure things out.

"I'll speak to you tomorrow Gil" she said

"Goodnight Cath" he mumbled "I'm glad you're okay"

"Thanks" she snapped her phone closed and placed it back on the table. Rolling over onto her side she wondered if sleep would come.


	3. Chapter 3

_Thank you everyone who's reading this and i hope you are enjoying this so far :) -Ellybop_

Chapter 3

About half an hour had passed, and she was no more likely about to fall asleep, when she heard a faint knocking. Ignoring it she rolled over and closed her eyes, until she heard it again, this time slightly louder. Sighing she got out of bed and once again pulled her robe over her and went to investigate, it was obvious once she had left her bedroom that it was the front door, slowly walking over to it she glanced through the peephole, and saw him standing there. She unlocked the door and stood back to let him in.

"What are you doing here?" She asked

"Telling you what's on my mind" he replied "If you want to hear it that is?"

"Could it have not waited until tomorrow?" she asked, sighing lightly, whatever it was that he wanted to get off his chest, she doubted it would be anything that she really wanted to hear.

"No, Cath. I want to tell you now. I'm ready to tell you now, I'm fed up of waiting for tomorrow" he said his eyes bore into hers and in the darkness of the room her heart began to pound beating violently in her chest. The sincerity of his stare was enough to make her crumble and he hadn't even opened her mouth to tell her his feelings yet.

"Okay," she whispered

He cleared his throat, this was a time he had thought about many times in the past, a time he thought he would keep putting off until 'tomorrow', he wouldn't wait any longer, he couldn't wait any longer. The fact that he could have lost her, and never told her had made him all the more certain that he finally needed to confess. His feelings would stay hidden no longer. The coward that he once was had gone. And in its place; left behind a man with courage.

"Let's sit down" he suggested Catherine nodded and headed over to her sofa where she sat, somewhat awkwardly. He sat next to her, facing her, gazing into her eyes. She really was perfect.

"Cath, the past 48 hours I was in my own kind of personal hell" he began "When we realised it was a kidnap, my heart fell, my stomach dropped and I didn't know what to do. The team were talking around me, figuring things out; I had to bite my lip to keep from shouting in frustration. Anything could have happened to you. I know Logan planned the whole thing, I know now you weren't in any danger at all. But at the time, you had never seemed to me, to be in more dangerous circumstances. The clues you were leaving were helping calm my nerves. But then, when we hadn't heard from you in a while I began to think the worst. What if you had gone. What if you had been cruelly ripped from this world—"

"Gil.." Catherine whispered interrupting him, he hadn't been looking at her while he was talking, his eyes were fixated on a point just over her shoulder.

"Let me finish" he said meeting her eyes for the first time since he began his speech, she nodded and his eyes glanced down into his lap.

"You could have been taken from me so soon, and I would never have had the chance to tell you how I feel. For hours I was battling the facts, everyone was saying that you would be okay, but I just couldn't believe it. I thought it was my punishment for keeping my feelings hidden for so long, an eternal punishment of myself never having telling you how I really felt.

"But then you called, and I heard your voice, so close to my ear, yet so far away. And everything flooded back into place again. You were still in my world. My life hadn't left me yet. But it dawned on me, that one day you would leave, and there would be no coming back." He looked up to meet her eyes again, he saw a tear glisten against her cheek and slowly wiped it away, she smiled at him.

"Catherine, I can't live in a world where you don't exist" he mumbled


End file.
